TACTICAL GEAR: If I Hear One More Person Talk About How F-ING Great MultiCam is

I am Going to Kick a Kitten in the Head

MultiCam is gay
MultiCam is gay

Man I can’t wait until my Chinese knock-off Crye Precision MultiCam gets here, the other guys in my “Unit” will be so jealous of me on our next “Op”

It seems like every other day I see a mil or tactical blog talking about how awesome MultiCam is. I swear I will smash a baby seal in the head with a baseball bat if I read “the Army is adopting MultiCam”, “Rangers use MultiCam” or “I want to suck-off MultiCam” again.

Seriously who gives a shit, like this is big news in the military community anyway, the US Military changes Cammo patterns more often than I change the oil in my car. That's why we here at DVM have never posted a picture of some Army unit who had their picture taken in a fake-ass posed action photo shoot wile wearing MultiCam.

james-g-clubbing-a-baby-seal
james-g-clubbing-a-baby-seal

James G. after reading another article about MultiCam

Another thing about MultiCam that annoys me, like less that 1% of military soldiers will ever be in a combat situation where they need cammo to conceal themselves from the enemy. So why is the military considering the most expensive cammo pattern available that they will surely issue to every Joe?

How much do you want to bet we will see thousands of fobbits wearing MultiCam on bases throughout Iraq and Afghanistan wile combat Marines and Army Infantry guys will still be stuck wearing UCP ACUs?

I would rather the military go back to spending 500 dollars on toilet seats than spend 300 bucks on a pair of MultiCam ACUs. At least I can use the toilet seat for something productive.

I would rather go into combat naked than wear MultiCam.

MyltiCam-is-agy
MyltiCam-is-agy

MultiCam is the Rainbow flag of the Tactical Community

*NOTE: Wile looking for pictures for this article I Googled “naked combat”, do not make the same mistake; I had to wash out my eyes with bleach and kerosene.

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~James G Founder - Editor in Chief

James G is a Veteran Civilian Contractor who has worked in the Middle East and Southeast Asia for way too long. He spends his off time in Indonesia and Virginia getting drunk, shooting guns, writing poorly written articles and being traumatized by Google images.